Tales From Our Near Future Read online

  Alisha walked off, leaving Freddy and Patty with the foursome.

  “Patty,” said Louis. “Who’s this new friend of yours?”

  “Freddy and I recently met,” said Patty.

  “How?” asked Louis.

  “A mutual friend,” said Freddy and Patty again in unison. They exchanged glances and laughed as this synchronized answer became a habit.

  “Cute,” said Louis. “What do you do, Freddy?”

  “IT for a government contractor,” responded Freddy. “And I understand you’re at GW?”

  Patty shot Freddy a sidelong look of curiosity.

  “That’s right,” said Louis, seemingly pleased that Freddy knew this. “I’m a biology professor.”

  “I assume that doesn’t necessarily mean that you lead frog dissections,” joked Freddy.

  Louis laughed. “I’ve done my share of those, believe me! But no. I spend most of my time in the lecture hall, spreading the joy of genetics to the masses.”

  “I’m sure you’re good at it,” said Freddy.

  “Did you go to GW?” asked Louis, his face scrunched in an effort to recall Freddy.

  “No, UNC,” said Freddy.

  “Oh, they have a great biology department there. Did you know Professor Wilkins?”

  (Professor James Wilkins, 62, head of the UNC biology department for over 30 years. Is there a connection? Louis has footnotes all over his PhD thesis pointing to Wilkins’s publications.)

  “I didn’t take biology, but I’ll bet you’re familiar with his work, right?”

  “Indeed I am. He’s a brilliant man.”

  “You mentioned genetics. Wasn’t Wilkins on the short list of Nobel Prize nominees? In genetics?”

  “Indeed he was,” said Louis, obviously impressed.

  “Something to do with therapeutic genetic cloning?” Freddy added. “Whatever that is.”

  “Right you are!” said Louis. “A very exciting area.” Louis turned to Patty. “Very smart fellow you have here.”

  “Yes,” she agreed. “Seems I do.”

  Howard cut in. “Louis, tell me you aren’t going to bore us all with more DNA voodoo talk.”

  “It is not voodoo talk,” Louis said defensively.

  “Whatever,” said Howard returning to sip his drink with a dismissive smirk.

  “You have to excuse Louis,” Howard said. “He’s a brilliant man. He really is.” Louis beamed at his partner’s praise. “It’s just that he can quickly get down into the weeds,” he continued, peering at Freddy over the top of his dark-rimmed glasses.

  “It’s OK,” said Freddy. Howard returned a dubious expression. “No, really, it is,” Freddy reinforced.

  “Well,” said Howard, “sometimes I think we come from different worlds. It’s amazing we’re together.”

  “So, you’re a writer?” Freddy asked Howard.

  “I write. Mostly editorials,” said Howard. “I doubt you’ve seen them.”

  “You mean like March on Washington for the 21st Century?”

  Howard, visibly surprised said “So you read The Blade? I don’t think so.”

  “I like to keep up to date. You made an interesting comparison between the gay rights movement and the civil rights movement.”

  “Well, thank you. I’m glad somebody here takes what I write seriously,” as he glanced over to Louis.

  “I take it seriously,” said Louis. “How many times do I have to tell you that?”

  Freddy said, “You guys are like Einstein and Picasso in the Lapin Agile.”

  They both turned. Louis said, “Excuse me?”

  “It’s a play by Steve Martin.”

  “Steve Martin? The comedian?”

  “Well, yes. But that’s not important. The point is that this made-up encounter between Einstein and Picasso show that each of them admires the genius of the other, although their genius fell in different realms. Just reminded me of you two.”

  Louis and Howard studied each other for a moment. At last, Louis said, “Well, hello genius.”

  Cantankerous Howard burst into a grin. “You too, smarty pants.” He traced a flirtatious finger down Louis’s lapel.

  Howard turned to Freddy. “You know, I think I like you.”

  Hans and Olivia had been standing by, intensely watching the bickering and exchange with Freddy. Finally Olivia said, “And we like you too, Howard. And you too, Louis.” Hans, not to be left out, raised his glass. “We all like each other.”

  “So, Hans,” asked Freddy. “What is it that you do? I seem to detect, perhaps, a Norwegian accent?”

  “Right you are,” said Hans. “I am from Oslo.”

  (Oslo: The population of moose within the city limits is greater than the population of people, but then again, the city limits are unusually large. Norway is the second largest oil producer in the world, right behind Saudi Arabia.)

  “People are always telling Hans he has a Swedish accent,” chimed in Olivia.

  “It’s true,” said Hans. “Nice to have someone get it right.”

  “So, how is life in Norway with all that oil money? Are you living like Saudi sheiks?” asked Freddy.

  “Ah, not so. We Norwegians like to tell ourselves that we are really poor,” Hans said with a wry smile. “We keep our hundred-year-old log homes but we put heating elements in all the sidewalks. We built an opera house on the water and drilled a highway tunnel through a mountain to serve a village of two hundred.”

  “Hans is quite the cross-country skier,” Patty added.

  “It’s true,” added Olivia admiringly.

  (Peer Gynt Trail: Runs on the west side of the Gudbrandsdalen Valley. Destinations along the way are well-known ski resorts with long traditions in winter tourism. The trail is an excellent cross-country alternative for families who are interested in a bit more challenging – yet still enjoyable – skiing experience.)

  “I hear the Peer Gynt Trail is the one to take,” ventured Freddy. Patty shot Freddy a befuddled glance as Hans studied Freddy.

  “You ski?” asked Hans.

  “I have tried cross-country,” responded Freddy, which was true, sort of. His dad and he borrowed skis from a neighbor in the storm of 1996 and tried it.

  “Well the Peer Gynt is nice, but I skied it only once,” said Hans.

  “Freddy,” said Patty, deftly moving the conversation in another direction, “Olivia is a tech geek like you.”

  Olivia playfully elbowed to the ribs and they both giggled. They obviously were good friends. “I work in the IT department at The World Bank,” she explained.

  “So, are you at The World Bank too, Hans?” asked Freddy (knowing the answer).

  “Yes,” he answered.

  “But not a geek like me,” said Olivia.

  “What do you do?” asked Freddy.

  “Email services,” responded Olivia.

  (Federal Week Headline: World Bank: Will They Leave Cloud Services?)

  “I understand your email is in the cloud,” Freddy said.

  “That’s right, but we are considering taking it back in house,” responded Olivia.

  (World Bank Emails Leaked on Potential Third World Loans.)

  “Security?” asked Freddy.

  “That’s right,” responded Olivia.

  “There have been too many emails getting out of the Bank that are causing a bit of embarrassment,” added Hans.

  “Oh, yes,” chimed in Howard. “All those banking escapades are hot reading!”

  “Well, yes,” admitted Hans, sheepishly. “It’s not Capitol Hill members’ sex texting.”

  With a momentary lull in the conversation, Freddy scoured his skull for some fresh material. (Olivia Newsom: Pastimes include knitting; Really? dining, and wine - once trained to be a sommelier. Interesting.)

  As luck would have it, Olivia held a glass of wine. “What is that you are drinking?” he asked.

  “It’s an Italian Merlot,” said Olivia.

  ‘Oh yes,’ thought Freddy, ‘Not just
Merlot but an Italian. She knows wine.’

  “Banfi?” asked Freddy.

  “You must have peeked,” said Olivia gesturing towards the beverage table.

  “Yes,” said Freddy, which was true. He had.

  (Banfi Merlot: Centine, actually can be from three different grapes: Sangiovese, Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot.)

  “I understand that it may be a Merlot or it may be something else,” Freddy ventured.

  “Actually, that’s true,” responded Olivia with a look of warm appreciation. “It may be Sangiovese, Cabernet Sauvignon, or Merlot. You know your wine.”

  “It seems Freddy knows a lot of things,” said Patty as she studied Freddy, who was smiling modestly.

  “I try to keep up,” Freddy offered.

  Alisha reappeared, balancing a sheet cake glowing with lit candles. Lisa clapped her hand over her mouth to cover the smile of delight as Alisha marched the cake to the table in the middle of the room. The crowd chorused a tuneless but spirited Happy Birthday. Lisa blew out the candles and Alisha began distributing small, cake-laden paper plates.

  Freddy and Patty found themselves alone for the first time since arriving.

  “So, you’re full of surprises,” said Patty.

  “What do you mean?” asked Freddy.

  “If I didn’t know better, I would have thought you got the guest list ahead of time and studied up,” Patty said watching Freddy’s face for clues.

  “Just lucky, I guess,” responded Freddy.

  “Does this info just come to you?” asked Patty.

  Freddy thought that Patty’s question seemed too close to the truth. He thought for a moment about the fact that someone who knew the truth about Freddy was the person who set him up with Patty. Patty’s question was like that of someone trying to determine the sexual preference of a newly met acquaintance to see if it might be the same.

  “Well, yes, I guess so,” said Freddy, uncertainly.

  “Hmm,” said Patty. That was all, just a thoughtful grunt.

  “Look, you’re a smart person, too,” Freddy said at last. “Things just come to you, too.”

  Patty looked Freddy directly into his blue eyes and said with a smile, “I guess that’s just the way we’re wired.”

  Freddy mirrored Patty’s gaze and returned the smile. She sidled closer and took his hand.

  There was, what seemed like to Freddy, an infinite silence in which the only communication coming to him was the warmth he felt as he held Patty close.

  “Come on, Patty.” A young woman about Patty’s age whom Freddy had not yet met grabbed Patty by the hand. “We have some special gifts for Lisa. You’ve got to see this.”

  “Oh, my gosh,” said the woman as she acknowledged Freddy for the first time, realizing she was interrupting what seemed to be a romantic moment. “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s OK,” said Patty. “Let’s go.” Turning to Freddy, she pecked him on the cheek. “Be right back?” she implored. “You’ll be ok?”

  The woman led Patty over to the table, where Lisa was about to open presents in the midst of her giggling friends.

  Freddy was alone, thinking about the exchange that just transpired. He refreshed his wine. Sipping it, he walked the perimeter of the room, observing gift-opening gaiety.

  “So serious!” said a voice behind him.

  Freddy turned to see the elderly woman he first noticed when they entered the party seated on the couch. She was wearing a stylish pink dress and her gray hair was well coiffed. Although she chose to remain seated throughout the party, she emitted more energy than one would expect from a little old lady.

  “Excuse me?” asked Freddy.

  “I’ve had my eye on you since you’ve been here. Sit down,” she said patting the seat beside her. “I won’t bite.”

  “So, you’ve been checking me out,” Freddy joked, settling in beside her.

  “Well, I noticed you,” she said. “What’s your name?”

  “Freddy.”

  “Freddy, as in Fred?”

  “Friedrich, actually.”

  “Well, your mother must be an interesting person, too, to have given you such a name,” said the woman. “My name is Betty. Mother lacked imagination. Glad to meet you, Freddy,” she said reaching to shake his hand.

  Freddy laughed. “Good to meet you, Betty,” he said.

  “You and that young woman make a nice couple,” observed Betty.

  Freddy smiled as he looked at Betty. “You think?” he asked.

  “Yes,” she said. “You two have something in common and it shows.”

  Freddy wondered whether Betty could see the uncanny connection he and Patty uncovered just moments ago. ‘There’s no way,’ he thought.

  “You seem to regale everyone you meet,” continued Betty. Freddy smiled again at the praise.

  “People like to hear about themselves. I think you flatter them by knowing something about them,” she said with a sly smile.

  Freddy digested this insight. He never thought of it that way, but she was right.

  “Betty, what’s your last name?” asked Freddy.

  “Don’t try,” Betty said as if she knew what Freddy was up to. “I’m old. I’m off the grid, as you might say.”

  Freddy’s smile withered. Betty seemed unnervingly on to him.

  Patty reappeared, tugging at his arm. “Would you mind if I stole him away for a moment?” she asked Betty. “Freddy, you’ve got to see Lisa’s gift haul.”

  Freddy let Patty pull him from the seat, distracted but still focused on Betty and her knowing smile.

  CHAPTER 5

  BACK AT PATTY’S

  Patty was feeling no pain. That was certain.

  When she opened her apartment door, she and Freddy stumbled into her living room.

  “Well, Mr. Freddy, you were quite a hit at the party,” she said putting her arms around his neck after regaining her balance.

  “Not true,” said Freddy.

  “Oh, yes, yes you were,” she responded.

  She then reached up and gave Freddy a deep, long kiss. She pulled back and smiled coyly.

  (Wow) Freddy thought, but the thought seemed not to be his. In his slight stupor he thought maybe Patty had said it, but she clearly had not. Maybe she thought it, but Freddy perceived it. He was just intoxicated enough to enjoy it without further exploration.

  Patty turned to the living room, leading Freddy to the couch, kicking off her heels along the way. Freddy needed no other signal.

  Near the couch, she turned around to Freddy and this time, it was Freddy who embraced her and kissed her fervently. Freddy reached to unzip her dress. (Right) he heard as he did it. He stopped briefly at this sound from the ether. Patty smiled, encouraging him to proceed.

  He slipped the dress from her shoulders and let it drop to the floor. Freddy fumbled to unhook Patty’s bra. (Ah) he heard. Patty stumbled over her dress, now piled at her feet. He lowered her onto the couch.

  The bra was now draped across her and Freddy quickly removed it. (Yes) He kissed each breast lightly. (More) He took each in his hands and gently sucked each nipple. (Harder) He sucked each harder. (Down) Freddy stood briefly and removed his shirt. (Nice) He removed his pants and dropped them, standing before her with only tight blue briefs bulging. (Oh) He reached down and slid Patty’s panties away. (Yes. Down. Please. Down.).

  Freddy knelt between Patty’s legs, lightly kissing her thighs. (Yes) Soon he arrived at his goal with his lips. (There. Yes.) A cacophony of delight and excitement echoed in Freddy’s ears. (Oh. Yes. God. Do it. Good.)

  Freddy stood and pulled down his briefs. He could not have been harder. (Here) Patty took him in her hand and pulled him close. (Gift) She took him in her mouth as Freddy closed his eyes to experience her turn at oral pleasuring.

  (Now) With Patty’s gaze steady, Freddy moved atop her. He kissed her around her neck and ears. (In) He entered her. She was wet, and he was able to penetrate fully. (Oh. Full. Big. Yes.)

  Freddy’
s love-making was somehow guided at every move. In the mix of passion and booze, he had not sorted out what was happening. He was totally in the moment. In the rarity of new lovemaking, they both climaxed at the same time. The words faded away as Patty fell asleep wrapped in Freddy’s arms.

  CHAPTER 6

  ALL KNOWING

  The dark glasses and nondescript blouse and skirt clearly stated that this was not a date. “What’s up?” asked Freddy as he sat down across from Patty in the nearby Starbucks. “You look all cloak-and-dagger today.”

  It had been two days since the party. Freddy called Patty the morning after their love-making and they purred affection to one another. Each of them had things that kept them from the other that very morning. Freddy was working and Patty said she had a meeting. Then, radio silence descended. Freddy texted Patty later in the day, but there was no response. Finally, two days later, Patty responded. “We have to meet,” was all the text said. Hence this meeting.

  “Freddy,” Patty started in a serious tone removing her dark glasses, “something’s come up.”

  “What?” asked Freddy, confused.

  “The other night, the night of the party,” she started.

  “Yes,” Freddy said with a smile. “It was a great evening.” He put his hand on hers. “You said so yourself.”

  “Freddy,” Patty continued. “Focus for a moment. See if you see something new about me.”

  “What do you mean?” asked Freddy.

  “Come on, Freddy. I know what you have,” continued Patty.

  “What? Why?”

  “Freddy, I know it because I have it too,” Patty said.

  Freddy said nothing. He faced Patty, completely expressionless.

  Patty continued “Look, we knew it at the party. Remember? ‘We’re wired alike?’”

  “But,” Freddy said, trying to evaluate the possibility.

  “OK,” Patty said. “This morning, you used the ATM at 14th and P on the way over here. You removed $100. You boarded the green line at 8:45 using your FastPass.”

  “How did you know?” asked Freddy.

  “I know the same way you know,” said Patty.

  “But none of that is open-level data,” replied Freddy.